<pedrocorreia.net ⁄>
 

<How to Shoot Yourself in the Foot in Any Programming Language ⁄ >




clicks: 4333 4333 2006-10-04 2006-10-04 goto entretenimento myNews entretenimento  Bookmark This Bookmark This


The proliferation of modern programming languages (all of which seem to have stolen countless features from one another) sometimes makes it difficult to remember what language you're currently using. This guide is offered as a public service to help programmers who find themselves in such dilemmas.

C
You shoot yourself in the foot.

C++
You accidentally create a dozen clones of yourself and shoot them all in the foot. Providing emergency medical assistance is impossible since you can't tell which are bitwise copies and which are just pointing at others and saying, "That's me, over there."

JAVA
After importing java.awt.right.foot.* and java.awt.gun.right.hand.*, and writing the classes and methods of those classes needed, you've forgotten what the hell you're doing.

Ruby
Your foot is ready to be shot in roughly five minutes, but you just can't find anywhere to shoot it.

PHP
You shoot yourself in the foot with a gun made with pieces from 300 other guns.

ASP.NET
Find a gun, it falls apart. Put it back together, it falls apart again. You try using the .GUN Framework, it falls apart. You stab yourself in the foot instead.

SQL
SELECT @ammo:=bullet FROM gun WHERE trigger = ‘PULLED';
INSERT INTO leg (foot) VALUES (@ammo);

Javascript
YOu've perfected a robust, rich user experience for shooting yourself in the foot. You then find that bullets are disabled on your gun.

CSS
You shoot your right foot with one hand, then switch hands to shoot your left foot but you realize that the gun has turned into a banana.

BASIC
Shoot yourself in the foot with a water pistol. On big systems, continue until entire lower body is waterlogged.

Visual Basic
You'll shoot yourself in the foot, but you'll have so much fun doing it that you won't care.

Prolog
You tell your program you want to be shot in the foot. The program figures out how to do it, but the syntax doesn't allow it to explain.



este é só um excerto do artigo, para aceder ao artigo completo, clique no link em baixo:
this is just a small excerpt from the article, to access the full article please click in the link below:

http://www.fullduplex.org/humor/2006/10/how-to-shoot-yourself-in-the-f...




Subscribe News RSS  Subscribe News Updates by E-mail





myNews <myNews show="rand" cat="entretenimento" ⁄>

7 Longest Roads in the World

Road trips are an iconic part of the American experience. Despite the ease and speed of air travel, (...)

clicks: 6807 6807 2011-03-01 2011-03-01 goto url (new window) interbent.com/7... goto myNews entretenimento


30 Most Amazing Shots Captured Photography in 2010

There're thousands of photographs you have seen in 2010. By Splitting into distinct categories, this (...)

clicks: 8440 8440 2010-11-23 2010-11-23 goto url (new window) smashinghub.com... goto myNews entretenimento


17 Amazing/Beautiful Examples Of Origami Art

The other day, we did a post on 16 Origami tutorials, which were easy and fun. This time, this list (...)

clicks: 7366 7366 2010-06-05 2010-06-05 goto url (new window) listfied.com/17... goto myNews entretenimento


As Lost Ends, Creators Explain How They Did It, What's Going On [Spoilers]

The series endured thanks to the power of faith (coincidentally, a theme of the show) and a more mod (...)

clicks: 6944 6944 2010-05-21 2010-05-21 goto url (new window) wired.com/magaz... goto myNews entretenimento


9 Strong Reasons To Eat Slowly

I like chocolate candies a lot. Most of the time I have to eat 3 candies to be totally pleased. But (...)

clicks: 7201 7201 2010-04-17 2010-04-17 goto url (new window) healthassist.ne... goto myNews entretenimento


World's Most Stunning Data Centers

Who says technology can't be art? These pictures show you some of the most impressive data centers o (...)

clicks: 7860 7860 2010-04-12 2010-04-12 goto url (new window) allamerican.yra... goto myNews entretenimento


FGLeague

(...)

clicks: 4289 4289 2008-02-21 2008-02-21 goto url (new window) fgleague.com/ goto myNews entretenimento


The Top 10 Attributes of a Great Programmer

With all the latest attention again on what does and doesn't make a good programmer, I couldn't help (...)

clicks: 4435 4435 2007-02-05 2007-02-05 goto url (new window) eureka3d.com/bl... goto myNews entretenimento